Self-love VS Pride
A friend recently posed a question about the difference between self-love and pride, particularly in the context of ending a relationship. It's a fine line, but an essential one to grasp.
Self-love means accepting and appreciating yourself completely, including your strengths, perceived weaknesses, and imperfections. It requires a willingness to expose our vulnerabilities, acknowledge our flaws, and take responsibility for our inner peace and well-being. This also involves recognizing our own detrimental or toxic behaviors and being compassionate enough to ourselves to overcome them without harsh self-judgment.
Pride, on the other hand, can manifest as an inflated sense of self-importance and an excessive focus on personal achievements. The statement "I deserve a better partner than him/her" actually stems from pride as well, as it implies the inferiority of the other party. While this mindset can be motivating, it can also blind us to our own shortcomings and impede our ability to learn from others.
The concept of 'deserving' arises from the belief that one must accomplish something to be worthy of certain things. However, understanding the interconnectedness of all beings entails recognizing that inherent worthiness is shared by all.
So how do you know that you’re ending a relationship out of genuine love for yourself and not because of your ego?
It’s self-love if it's about prioritizing your peace and recognizing that the relationship no longer serves you. Genuinely loving yourself requires significant inner work, but when approached correctly, it generates a magnetic energy that naturally attracts those aligned with love and repels those who are not. By loving yourself, you come to realize that any hurt inflicted upon you by another person stems from their own unresolved issues. When this realization occurs, it becomes evident that the relationship no longer aligns with your energetic field, leading to the decision to end it. You genuinely wish the person well and proceed to focus on yourself.
However, leaving out of egoistical pride is primarily about proving something to yourself or others, seeking validation, or maintaining a certain image. If the intention is to one-up the other person or to 'show them what they're missing,' then it stems from pride. In this case, the focus, even if you may be unaware of it, still remains on the other person.
Pride makes you believe that you’re better than them and that you deserve better treatment because of perceived exceptionalism. On the other hand, self-love recognizes each person’s inherent worth and honors our individual journeys.
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